Awwwwww

Yeah so the weird thing is about blogging is that it is slightly addictive. No matter that no really reads it, its just there, and you are compeled to post. As Ive said before the blog here will come to a close soon, probably when I scrap up enough energy to post some promised pics. Pics that have been mentioned so much that most of the people who ever see this have started to think of them as a sort of El Dorado. In the mean time, to try to not to lose ALL of the readers (since I have so many-I cant really bitch about not having readers since Ive gone to some lengths to keep this blog a secret) I thought Id go on more awards....

Absolutely Hottest Security/Customs/Army: Far and away, Israel. Seriously, Id advise all guys to to vist this place just to get a glimpse of the ridiculousness of the customs agents. Although I never made out with one (sniff) the Israeli's know atleast one thing, and thats always having one up on Khadafi's security hotness level.

Most Insane City Ive Ever Set Foot In: Cairo. Period. Ive said it before, I'll say it again, if you want some real Arab/Islamic culture go here. Even though Ive only been to 3 Mid East countries, this place seems to be the platform for setting the crazy bar (atleast from what I gather from people who have gone elsewhere).

Easiest Arab Country to go to: Jordan. While a good number of the group I was with had problems adjusting to Arab culture, this place makes Egypt seem like the moon. And Egypt makes this place seem like some state in America you didnt really know about, except it was full of Ara Muslims.

One of the Most Screwed People Groups (well kinda) on the Planet: Alhtough this award could be tied for by several people, and the Pals are technically Arab, the Palestinians, yay for Arab Unity. My Palestinian teacher made the jokes how there are no Palestinians in Palestine, but theyre everywhere else in the world. After talking with several of them I tend to agree.

not dead

yeah, so for the maybe 20 readers of this blog, Im back in America. Yes, its true, Im not dead-whatever rumors you may have heard. I promise for my devoted readers I tried to post at my parents house in Tahleqauh, unfortunately my parents comp has been overly raped by viruses most probably caused by my sisters. Thus, the reason why I tried to post twice and it was rejected by the almightly internet.

The one thing Ive wondered about since I go back is if the one guy , James, ever made it back to the City on a Hill. Ironically, he made several statements about the plight of the proletariate in Jordan. He was then rewarded with British Airways striking on s return flight home. He decided (and we agreed) that taking your complaints to English speaking people would be better, than say Arabic speaking people. I realized only too late that going to the epicenter of f'ed up ed ness would be a bad choice, whence he had already gone too.

A point on strikes, if whatever service you were planning on going to travel on is striking, its probably NOT a good idea to go there. He went to I think Heathrow, which I think is the epicenter of f;ed up ed ness. In retrospect, which is always 20/20, he should have gone far from this place of a 10,000 people refugee camp. I guess you never can learn too much about the West Bank. Anyway, I hope he made it home, I saw today BA started to serve hot meals. Maybe he'll have warmed cheese pizza when he makes the 11 hour trip back. In Sha' Allah.

In other news, Im too tired to retype for the third time what I think of America since Ive came back, that will come later, along with the pics.

All's I'll say is, I really want to join the Army. Seriously.

Leavin' on a jetplane

So since Im too paranoid (rightly so if you know of my ability to sleep through important things is) that I wouldnt wake up to go to the airport at 4 I decided to just stay up the rest of the night. I figure Im only losing 2-3 hours of normal sleep, and being awake on intercontinental flights is a riot to begin with, Im not going to miss much.

The last things I'll say before Im ferried off to the airport is the Jordan experience (and before hand as well) really in no brought me closer to understanding anything completely (not even counting the Arabs). To be squishy and stuff, the more you learn largely opens up more questions that need answering.

The Jordan part of the blog seemed to concentrate more on who the Arabs are/or how does their society function. In some ways I think I answered some qeustions for myself, but in others, spending not even 8 weeks in the Mid East can really give you the material needed to address these questions.

I guess in a way this last post is the most lame of all I think Ive posted. Its more of a promise to all the people I met and friends I made here they wont be forgotten, or nicely generalized and boxed up with a pretty little bow. At the end of it, do I hate the Arabs? No way. Are there some things that bug the crap out of me? You betcha (having to ask the price everytime at a place we freqeunt pops to mind). But are there great things about this culture? Absolutely, theres a reason why the West has found this place and people so exotic and exciting.

Enough emoting, I gotta leave (literally).

PORN! THIS IS PORNOGRAPHY!

Well currently as of this very second Im sitting at the hotel waiting for one of my teachers to come by and give me the power point presentation cd she made of our class. So since Gallery Net (r.i.p.) has turned into a worm buffet in the business sense, Im left using the hotels comps. The comps are okay, but have bacially been overthrown with whatever is out there on the internet (spy ware, etc.) from the peoples staying here love of looking at porn on a public computer. Gary always would trash the desktop links, and on one's background made a wallpaper appealing for people not to indulge themselves. Man, waiting in the hotel sucks.

Besides me, theres 3 other guys left here. There should only be 2, but British Air decided to strike today, thus sending the poor student back to the hotel after he had arrived at the airport. Of course, when you make a "your mom" equivalent of a joke in the Church of the Holy Sepulcere God tends to get pissed. So I guess he deserved it really. Its kinda like an incredibly boring thriller movie where you wait to see if we actually get to leave. Im not sure if any of the rest of us have done anything too bad, so I think I'll be okay. In Sha'allah.

I realized after I posted yesterday my post had some not factual errors, but was somewhat misleading. Micheal Moore does it and no one cares, so why cant I? Its really not that big of a deal but after 67' Jordan does not give citizenship to the Pal's. One of the girls we met was born in Jordan, but her family is Pali, hence, shes paying the equivalent of out-of-state tutition to go to school. Geez, America gives citizenship away like cheap candy. Here everyone is so intent on not taking in the Pali's it doesnt even matter where you're born. Good ol' Arabs, being all unified and such.

Oh yeah, the title of the post yesterday was concerning a joke Ive heard several taxi drivers tell me about Jordan being the 52nd state. I cant remember if Ive said anything about that. (if youre not up to date on your Arab jokes, Iraq is the 51st)

Well, I guess I'll go back to waiting for the teacher, assuming she comes, In Sha'allah. Im going to miss being here. Being able to walk to McDonalds (or have it delivered), bootleg new movies and cd's, American music videos...yes I'm kidding.

I'll be back soon, hope the blog was atleast something you could kill time on.

52nd Statehood

So earlier this week as we left our dear Gallery Net, those of us who still had time on our accounts were given payouts. Why? Yeah, I asked the same thing, its becuase the next day the place was shutting down. Man that sucks, our dear home away from home, well the hotel, is gone forever. I guess if you wanted to be all squishy you could say its a metaphor for my trip ending, but not me. The thing is now I cant play that retarded Zero Hour game. Today is my second day of no stealthed Stinger sites, bombing the crap out of people with Aurora Alpha bombers, or upgrading my Chinese Gattling Cannons with 25% more effectiveness. Whats more bad though, had Gallery Net closed say, 4 weeks ago, I wouldnt have ever gotten playing that game in the first place. Now, I just feel empty.

But anyway, forgive my self sorrow, I thought I'd try to dip into a little tradtional whiny blogging, now thats fun.

So before I came here I knew there was some resitment btwn Saudis, Kuwati's and pretty much all the other Arabs, the books dont lie. Theres been several stories of the Jordanians here being pissed off at the citizens of the KSA, but besides being pissed they've turned out to be a great joke mines, kinda like the French. Last night I went out to a cafe with a group of people, along in tow were a few Arabs from school. One of the girls started saying how beautiful the Saudi women there were, the end of the joke is their eyes are the best (think veils). While little jokes about the women being covered are fairly innocent, other times you see the (atleast Jordanians) being largely unwelcoming to their oil drenched Arab brothers. It kinda dives into the myth of Arab Unity, money seems to be more important than being one strong nation. My girl teacher told us they went to Kuwait when her family moved from Palestine in 1950. Now most of them are in Jordan since Jordan is one of the few countries that actually gives Pal's citizenship (if they give up Pal citizenship) and Kuwait wouldnt.

But anyway, Im coming back in 2 days, and thus, so the blog will most probably be coming to an end. When I get back I may do some clean up stuff, and put up some of the cooler pics, but Im pretty sure this site's days are numbered. The reason I made it was so people could read about what I was doing when I was abroad, my life in America is far less interesting.

Going back to the City on the Hill, though it seems a little dirtier now.

The Base

So today I woke up in, what I later realized, was a strangley silent hotel room. We keep our curtains back so waking up at 6 sometimes isnt that rare with the sun pouring in. Laying there thinking about how I needed to get a shower so I could run down to the bus I realized my dear roommate, little Gary Gary Gary Gary wasnt there. Then I realized my clock said 10:30. Crap, I was probably one of 5 people here that havent skipped any days of class, now Ive just been kicked out of that club. I do know that when Im awakened when I still want to be asleep, I'll basically say anything my brain can get out to go back to sleep. You want me to be here at that time? Yeah, yeah, 30 more seconds. I doubt I was just left sleeping, but as to what I said to stay in bed is a total mystery. One I assume I'll find out when everyone gets back.

Walking out in the silent, empty hall felt like I was in one of the creepy Silent Hill video games, where everything starts out kinda off, then gets super weird. Standing in the hall for about 10 minutes, no kind of weird monster dogs wandered around the corner, or big tentacles came out of the walls. So Im fairly sure Im still in the reality I was in when I went to bed. Atleast, I really hope so.

What do you do when you wake up and everyones gone? I dont know, so I went and got something to eat, promised I'd study later extra hard, and came to my home away from home, the Gallery Net internet cafe.

So anyway, Keaton asked in an email if how I thought the Arabs might adapt to a Movientcian government. I'm not really sure right now, I just erased a good chunk of the post about Mov., Im not sure if people really want this to become the Mov. open forum (I think I can actually hear the sighs of relief).

But in other news, the headscarf post is once again getting pushed back by another topic, stupid Hollywood. I know Ive talked about this in atleast a few emails with people, and since I dont ever really look back at the posts Im pretty sure I havent said anything about it before here.

To set up why I'm talking about this, I'll submit the latest, and probably greatest example of how Hollywood is the absolute worst PR machine for America, even more than stories about ripped up Qurans, bombs on Iraqi civilians, or constantly veteoing stuff for Isreal ever could. So the story goes, 2 girls out of the group fed this cat, and have given it medicine for an eye infection next door of the hotel. The cat hangs around in front of this house, which some dude lives in (yes, a guy living in a house, shocking). Anyway, so 2 nights ago the girls are looking for the cat and the guy comes out and motions them inside. Theyre thinking the cat is in there and go in, they continue thinking this until they reach the bedroom and hes smiling and motioning them to the bed. Against his hopes, the 2 American girls did not have sex with him right on the spot. I had gone with them a few times before to watch Sara shove her finger down the cats throat to make sure he got the medicine, now I have to go to escort the girls when theyre propostioned for favors.

Whats bad, is this story is really just the best example of how it is here, and there are plenty other stories to go along with it. Becuase of Americas out of control soft empire, the Arabs are fed a steady diet from Hollywood, from sticoms to movies. The end result is that all black people will rob or murder you, cities are extremly dangerous, and American girls really just hate not having sex with the nearest guy.

I guess on one hand, they are kinda right, where American girls are absolute dirty, dirty whores compared to the much more laid back, not stupid, and largely virginal Arab girls. But on the other hand, geez, thanks Hollywood. A picture of how America is has been swallowed wholly by the people here, trying to correct this person by person is a job all in itself.

Yup, still dont want to go back to the States, please mail me my Unicorns cd and then I'll no reason to leave.

In Sha'allah

I should note, one nice thing, is when I got back from Jerusalem the tv finally went back to normal. Gone were the stations broadcasting a still image of King Fahd, gone were the Quran readings, gone were the moving pictures of King Fahd. I should note that for about 3 weeks Gary and I never turned on the tv. Its mnostly the Melody Hits music channel that comes on every once in a while. Although, becuase the hotel can apparently select its channels through satellite, but wont show all of them, we now have CNN and BBC World News. Right in time to leave.

In other news I thought I give atleast some closure on the Arab issue, which I abandoned for a while, well, until now. So those of you who want to skip the weak analysis start madly scrolling to see if I try to be funny. The main thing Ive noticed is that, in watching people, and just hearing them talk, that Islam has definately crashed into the Modern world. Or, more realistically vice versa.

One of the more funny things you wouldnt think is an issue is Arabic as a language. See, today there are basically 2 Arab languages, basically classical (Foosah), and modern (Ammeeah). People learn classical when they go to college, but modern is the far more wildly spoken, which then breaks down into country and regional dialects (thats why its really hard to talk to the wedding kids-we know almost all classical and they only can speak modern). So wheres this going? Muslims believe the Quran was written in a perfect language, Classical Arabic. The problem with the perfect language is that its set back in the seventh century. The Arabs riding camel carevans then werent exactly thinking up words for things that didnt exist, car, nuclear bomb, cheeseburger, bikini's, etc., etc. So the language, as all do, has evolved, but its now not Classical, its Modern. The really hard core guys search the Quran to form chains of words from Classical to fit the modern words, the less hard core use as much Classical as they can. They rest (most) use Modern.

What the big stink is, is that the world is changing, and its not at all like the Arab Pennisula was at the 7-9 centuries. The language losing its power is a big deal when youre holy text is written in it. I think I made that sort of clear, like I said yesterday, I always forget what Im going to say by the time I get to the internet cafe.

The second thing I'll touch on (since I dont want to write pages) is similar to the language problem. I dont know how Islam affected Arab culture in the past since I wasnt there, from the history books Ive read I'm guessing that Islam has created a strain with Arab culture since its begining. Now the world has, and is changing quicker it seems than the Arabs really are comfortable, topics like if there was no oil, or had it already ran out, or is there really a thing called "Arab unity" are common in Arab intellectual circles. Really, it seems like just a cry saying "Geez, what if the West just f'ing backed off and left us alone"

I really think this collision has caused alot of the stress in the society, people wanting to embrace the modern world risk being bad Muslims, people wanting to go back to days of yore are going to have to wait until the world economic system crashes. Both my teachers are really cool and nice, but (esp with the guy) you can see how the modern world has trouble fitting smoothly with Islam.

Now some of you are saying, "Hey every society and people are adapting to change, and just b/c the Arabs seem to have a hard time with it doesnt mean other places, say America dont either. Come off your high horse so we can stone you." Yeah thats right, but the point of this is I've been trying to figure out the Arabs, and I think this is a major thing. Pretty much the first hour I stepped foot in Cairo I knew this part of the world has trouble being explained by the West, all the books, doc's and lectures I've heard didnt come close to preparing me. You can make the Arab thing out to be an easy thing of opposites, almost everything is backwards here, ex. its looked down on to work with your hands (why Saudis and Kuwati's dont work), being fat means your rich, they write right to left, their language is actually one giant trick becuase you have to learn 2 to speak with people (classical and modern) so to torture students, the list goes on.

Yeah, so I definately lost my way on trying to explain this, and trying not to cross the always risky point to generalize and tell people what they want to hear. Hope I said something partially coherent. Comment or email if anyone has something to say.


I'll be back in a week if you want to beat me.

Walking is faster

Having a blog is kinda hard work. If I think of something funny to post I'll usually do that when Im day dreaming in class or on the bus, niether time I have access to a computer to type down my witty and interesting insights. Then, when I do roll around to having a little computer in front of me Im usually thinking how I should get back to the hotel and do some homework, since my addiction to this stupid Zero Hour game claims the time before hand. On the upside, I think Im sick of that game, or have been for awhile. The bad part is I keep playing with the other guys even though I dont really want to or enjoy, Im just compelled to. The only good thing about having to return to America is that game will be left half way across the world. Unless by chance they sell computer games in America, I'll have to check into that.

Any way, I led a group of people back to Jerusalem, that city is awesome. Being there isnt much to type about since we ended up being there less than 24 hours (about 20 I'd say, but only 2 sleeping). The semi interesting part, or the part where one might get an glimpse into dealing with Arabs on a daily basis, was getting there.

We knew we had to leave immediately after lunch, so we asked our bus driver to call us a taxi, which would be there in 20 minutes. The guy finally showed up after about exactly an hour and 20 minutes, and the "taxi" turned out to be the bus drivers brother, or cousin, or whatever. So the guy shows up to pick up 8 people with a van that has 7 seats, except he also has another guy along for the ride. After 4 people on one bench, 3 in the back and one guy sharing the front seat with mystery dude we took off.....to around Jordan. When we passed a sign saying a town we had already been by was close it slowly (or quickly) became very clear our taxi driver had no real idea how to actually get to the bridge (unless you count *that way*, point in general western direction). By the time we got there the bridge had closed 20 minutes earlier, the stop the let the van cool down probably didnt help. We asked him when it did close, he said 3. That was probably the truth, since taxis are picking up people 2 and a half hours after it closed.

He offered to take us to the northern crossing, but after the time it closed chnaged from 9 to 8, and he asked 2 people for directions, we just said to take us to the Dead Sea. The next morning we got it. That city rocks, its really just fun being there. You could be sitting and still be having more fun than any rollercoaster could offer at Frontier City.

On a sad note though, my goal of making out with a super hot Isreali girl was never realized. Guessing that I might not be back until Im older, and thus, chances further diminished, I'll just have to cry myself to sleep every night for awhile. I doubt though, my semi hobo look of wearing the same pair of jeans and shirt for however long, combined with lack of showering the day before, and sweat (ohhh the sweat) helped my cause. *Sniff*

Ive decided to now dedicate the following to a few awards that need to be given for the summer:

"Coolest City": Jerusalem. By far, I cant get enough of it. The combo of current politics, being a center for 3 religions that have a third of the earth belonging to them, and the history (5,000 years ago to the last 60) make it something no other city can compare to. Its awesome.

"Coolest/Most Interesting Person": That Sergey guy I met in Amman, if there was awards for "Person Ive Met Thats Killed the Most People, and Also Probably Should Have Died Several Times" he would get that one too. He's also get the "I Now Have to Buy an Under Armor Shirt Becuase Youre Wearing One Too" award. Good luck Sergey, I hope the car you select to purchase is a good one and lasts a long time without any transmission trouble or whatnot.

Runner Up: I dont think he killed anyone, but a Arab guy I met the first time in Jerusalem named David. He bought me coffee and this sweet cheese stuff. So he get a spot too.

"People That Know of, but Clearly Dont Understand What a Travelers Check, or Does": The Jordanians at Hashemite University, and Arab Bank. To further complicate me trying to pay for school, they wont take TC's. Even after they said they did, awww thats sweet of them. And no, I still dont care that it takes a month for you to get the money from them. See, its a check thats already paid for, so youll get the money. And no, they dont work by you sending them to Am Ex, then Am Ex sending you the cash and you giving it to me. If thats what happened, I would have probably just brough cash in the first place.

Thats it for now. Oh yeah at the McDonalds in J-town they had Mc Sharma (chicken stuff) and McKebabs (not like American Kebabs). But they dont have them here in Jordan, super crappy. And yes, we had to eat there becuase no where else was open at the time. So shut up.

Do I have to back in a week? Well, technically "no", hmmmmmmmmm

Thanksgiving

So after I did the first post today I was notified that since King Fahd died, no school tomorrow. Yes! The flags have been lowered (and some turned upside down?), and the channels we have mostly have Quran verses shown and being read, or pictures of the dead King, or people talking about him. Man, for a coma guy, somebody really liked him (or thats just what you do when youre the Saudis, Im sure some members of the royal fam are less than excited).

To sum it up, I'll qoute what our minder guy said about school tomorrow "Thanks King Fahd" (insert the guys laughing)

What you miss in class

Man, a bunch has happened in a matter of 24 hours...

Ol' King Fahd finally died after spending 10 years in a coma, or vegetative state, or something where you cant rule youre country. Now Crown Prince Abdullah is taking over the sand castle of Saud. It'll be interesting what happens since according to a few books and whatnot Ive read he about the only one (lucky he was the CP) that wanted to clean up the royal family's corrupt, hedonistic...errr, good Muslim lifestyle.

Also, the Dead Sea apparently liked me even more than I liked it and gave me some salt in my digital camera so now it cant focus. Im thinking I might could crack it open and just use a manipulated stolen fork from the hotel resturant to fix whatever is the problem. All the chips and crap in there is just to scare you to not fix it yourself.

Annnnd, after a long, long, and over explained story, my bank cant do a wire transfer here. A few other options would make paying the school easier, like if they took credit cards. The Jordanians, never failing to give you surprizes along the way though, do not. You can watch me withdrawing the max amount I can off my credit card everyday to get enough cash to throw it on their desk and laugh.


Anything thing else? Oh, some girls found a kitten that has an eye infection (eyes crusted shut) near our hotel. Instead of the mercy death I suggested they've began giving him antibiotics, and its working. Now, since the eye infections are re-occuring, the cat should have atleast a few years of running aroung Amman making more cats before it starves to death with another eye infection.

Man, I have less than 2 weeks left. This thing should have been like 12, or a year.